barbantulas

I dunno, this just struck me as really hilarious:
http://a.parsons.edu/~lina/thesis/sept/proto1/barbantula.jpg

regular wit

from the An Aphorism A Day Keeps the Doctor Away Dept.

"A turd in the can is worth two in the tush."

The meaning should be self-evident.

... which is to say, creative constipation is major bumsville.

i'm a foodie because ...

I hate bacon, but love pancetta;
I loathe cabbage, but adore endives;
I despise spinach, but revere swiss chard;
I'm revolted by green beans, but enraptured by haricot verts.

... apropos of nothing, except rampant foodieism everywhere -- and my eternal conflict between loving food and still getting a shiver down my spine every time I hear that word.

brokeback cartoon

from the Someone Should Get On It Dept.

ok, picture a New Yorker style cartoon about a son wanting to be a cowboy, or maybe coming home in a cowboy costume ... like for Halloween or something ... and the dad says to the mom, "oh no, I KNEW you were pampering him too much" ... or something to that effect.

Also, doesn't Brokeback kind of give a new meaning to Willie Nelson's "Mammas Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Cowboys"?

you dick, reprise

Apropos of my previous post about The Dick, and The Dick's recent accident, I just want to say HOW MUCH GREAT headline potential there is here ... I'll spare you any links to the tired out story, and just list some headlines that come to mind that I wish some major media sources had had the (dare I say it) balls to print:

"While Hunting, Dick Loses Control and Sprays Friend"
"Out of Control Dick Hits Friend"
"Man Stands in Front of Dick, Gets Sprayed"
"Minor Accident Involving Dick Spraying in Woods"
(and finally)
"What a Dick!"

and now, the obligatory link to Mr Spicoli (sorry, I just never get tired of that one.)

pink fanny pack in the shape of buns

from the Someone Should Get On It Dept.

Please? get on that.

sinterest

from the Neologism Dept. (aka, the Daily Candy Lexicon Still Sucks Dept.)

sinterest - noun interested, but in a sinful way

Sample usage:

Dude 1:"I dont know, I mean, she's hot, but doesnt have a very good personality."
Dude 2:"oh, I get it bro ... you're not interested but you are sinterested"
Dude 3:"aw SNAP! I heard that"
<wink wink><nudge nudge><crotch thrust>

Orr, ladies, let me put it in a context you will understand:

Babe 1:"hm ... do I want that piece of chocolate or not? I just can't decide. hm."
Babe 2:"Go for it hun. Sounds like you are really sinterested."

you dick

How perfect is it that Cheney's first name is Dick?

I mean, seriously. How many times have you thought about this before? I've thought of it a few times ... but i think we should all pause and think of it again. I mean, ya, Bush is funny too ... ha ha, his name is Bush. But I mean, Cheney? I mean seriously, he is SUCH A DICK!

This is unremarkable news, but simply yet another example of his dickishness. [truthout.org]

We all know Sean Penn says it now, but few remember how much more succinctly he put it only a few years ago (WAV file). [moviewavs.com]

jay the sensitive sensai

from the Someone Should Get On It Dept.

ok, here's an idea for a Saturday Night Live skit. Jay the Sensitive Sensai. Picture like the Cobra Kai sensai from Karate Kid.

Scenario 1:
Jay: "You must FIGHT. and you must KILL.
always fight to win. never fight to lose"
Student: "But Sensai Jay, how can we bla bla bla?"
Jay: "awww, I dunNO ... sometimes I just .... "
whatever, and then just get all emotional.

Scenario 2:
Jay: "ok, class, are you gonna fight?!"
Whole class: "YES, SENSAI!"
Jay: "are you gonna show no mercy?"
Whole class: "YES, SENSAI!"
Jay: "ok, do you guys reeeally mean that? because like, you always answer in the same way and it kind of just sometimes makes me wonder if you're even listening or if you're just mindlessly saying what you think I want to hear."

Scenario 3:
Jay: "Alright Danny, that's it. Drop and give me 20. I mean, unless you really don't want to. I know your arms must be sore from practice yesterday. ok, give me 5. or, ok, just go give Bobby a hug and apologize. ya know what guys? Lets just go get ice cream sundaes. on me!"

in pursuit of trivia

... just taking a random walk through wikipedia today. And reading up on some terms that I found floating around in my head ... and that somehow to me seem associated in some random way.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Valhalla
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Potemkin_village
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gulag

also, the first led me to:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Valkyrie

and interestingly, this ny town:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Valhalla,_New_York

kate moss day

Upcoming bronze sculpture of her doing a yoga pose:
guardian.co.uk
huffingtonpost.com
entertainment.news.com.au
timesonline.co.uk

also lucien freud's painting of her pregnant is for sale at chrysties
chinadaily.com.cn

ok, all this googling was triggered by the popbitch email today ... in its own version of my "Big Question Dept" (ie, "What people are asking this week"), the gossip column inquired: "Which member of Kate Moss's circle is claiming the supermodel is pregnant?"

Could it be?

... and is it Lindsay Lohan's baby???

what a Deutsch-bag

Right-on to this analysis of the George C. Deutsch / NASA situation by Joshua Micah Marshall at TalkingPointsMemo.com .

How many absurdly pathetic and transparent instances of cronyism are we going to have to suffer through before people really start realizing this as a pattern.

A quoted passage from the post:

It's worth taking note of the word choice [in Deutsch's memo to NASA] because it captures the mix of obscurantism and relativism which has characterized all the Bush administration's attitude about science and, really, pretty much all empirically based knowledge -- something we discussed at length here.

The rub here is the failure to see that knowledge which has been subjected to and survived -- indeed been strengthened by -- empirical and theoretical scrutiny stands on a higher footing than information that hasn't. This isn't pedantry. Nor is this some obscure alcove in the science curriculum.

This mindset -- obscurantism and relativism duking it out to be of most use in the pursuit of power -- suffuses the Bush administration: a lack of respect for facts and the set of tools we use to discern factual information from chatter and bombast.

improvisation and "black" music

from the Big Question Dept.

ok, this is kind of a difficult question/subject to broach/discuss, but here goes ...

Why is it that improvisation has been such a key element in all black music movements throughout American history? (Thinking of blues, jazz, funk, hiphop, and now crunk [and now hyphy. -ed])

I suppose it could simply be the case that improvisation was introduced early (ie, jazz/blues) and all the other movements have built upon each other so that motif was repeated. But I think there must be some other reason that this particular element has repeatedly carried through, and has always been so central to each movement.

I'm just going to go out on a limb and say there is something extremely liberating about improvisation. Its like saying, perparations, money, lessons, anything, I can stand here and express my identity/ideas/relevence/intelligence (things that have all been denied of black people in many and varried ways throughout history) as good or better than any other person who is standing here improvising with me. Its like it makes the past and future irrelevent.

Of course this is not all entirely true since it requires immense amounts of time and preparation to have the abilities to improvise in a meaningful way. But I think its the feeling more than the actuality.

Anyway, thats just my random theory. Would be interested to hear anything anyone else has to say.